You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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