should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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