Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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