It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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