its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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