Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
