My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
