Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
