Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
