Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
FUCK WHALES
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
