I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Everclear isn't food dammit
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
