Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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