Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Randomize
