Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
