I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Randomize
