I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
