You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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