Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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