I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
