No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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