Me too!
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Randomize
