We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
