69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize