we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
