A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
