operation harelip BJ is a go
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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