My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
