So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Randomize
