you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
