Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
