So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
