I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
