She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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