its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
