ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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