Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
