Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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