What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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