We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
