He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
