do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
