Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
