I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize