Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
