I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
