True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
