I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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