She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
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