somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize