Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
